Hamlet’s Daytimer
FRIDAY
2:00 P.M.
Fathers Funeral
Catch the 8:15 from Wittenberg for Dads Funeral
REMEMBER!! Send postcard to Ophelia (with words of so sweet breath composed as to make the postcard richer)
12:00 p.m.
Inherit crown, (Huzzah!)
1:00 p.m.
Rule Denmark (Double Huzzah!)
Funeral Speech??
What a grace was seated on this brow,
So long, Dad its my country now! (ha ha.)
11:00 a.m
Meeting with Uncle Claudius
Cancel 12:00 and 1:00
Mope furiously
MONDAY
2:00 P.M
Mothers Wedding
Contact travel agent re: refund on return ticket to Wittenberg
(retrograde THIS to your desire, you prick!)
Wedding Speech??
Oh that this too, too solid flesh, would melt
Thaw and resolve itself into a dew
Wow! Thats really good! I should use that sometime.
2:25 P.M.
Use cool speech
2:30 P.M.
Late lunch with Horatio, (Or I do forget myself)
12:00 a.m.
Meeting with Dad
SET IT DOWN: One may smile and smile and be a villain.
One may also smile and smile and be an idiot. The latter is more likely.
TUESDAY
8:00 a.m.
Kill Claudius
Cancel my 8:00
8:15 a.m.
Put an antic disposition on .
8:30 a.m.
Visit Ophelia Ask if she got the postcard
9:00 a.m.
Sulk
10:00 a.m.
Mope
11:00 a.m.
Act loopy
Saw Ophelia, but drew a total blank on the card. I knew I wanted to ask her something, it just wasnt coming to me. I feel like an idiot, all I did was stare at her and sigh.
12:00 p.m.
Read sadly
1:00 p.m.
Coffee with Rosencrantz and Guildenstern.
(Dont forget to ask if they were sent for)
NOTE** Leartes left for France this morning. Be in continual practice, or he will kick my ass when he comes back.
WEDNESDAY
8:00 a.m.
Kill Claudius
Cancel my 8:00
8:30 a.m.
Players Reception. (see if you can weasel a free speech out of them)
11:00 a.m.
Suicide
Cancel 11:00
Famous speech instead??
12:30 p.m.
First Rehearsal for The Mousetrap
Give to Ophelia: (Pamphlet for that lovely nunnery in Wittenberg)
3:00 p.m.
Affront Ophelia (remembered the pamphlet, but forgot about the postcard again!!)
THURSDAY
8:00 a.m.
Kill Claudius
Cancel my 8:00
11:00 a.m.
Second rehearsal (Mousetrap)
12:00 p.m.
Sigh
1:00 pm.
Mope
5:00 p.m.
Be Gloomy
7:30 p.m.
Notes session with Actors (Opening Night gifts?)
FRIDAY
8:00 a.m.
Kill Claudius
Cancel my 8:00
9:00 p.m
OPENING NIGHT!!! (Huzzah!)
Be idle
10:00 p.m.
Cast party
Canceled due to extremely poor critical reaction
12:00 a.m.
Kill Claudius
Reschedule my 12:00 (bad timing)
12:30 a.m.
Visit Mother
Kill Claudius
Polonius
NOTE: Must Kill Claudius, Dads getting pissed
SATURDAY
8:00 a.m.
Kill Claudius
Cancel my 8:00
9:00 a.m
Talk to travel Agent re: England. (Pirate insurance?)
NOTE** Send memo to Fortinbras, polite inquiries as to what the Hell hes doing in Denmark
TUESDAY
1:00 a.m.
April Fools Joke on Rosencrantz and Guildentern (ha ha)
3:15 p.m
Stopover: Change Boats (Make sure Horatio can come pick you up)
SATURDAY
8:00 a.m.
Kill Claudius
Cancel my 8:00
12:30 p.m.
Lunch with Horatio
Stop by Graveyard, harass a few Sextons.
3:00 p.m
Ophelia’s Funeral (Nobody tells me anything!). Now Ill NEVER know about the postcard
Funeral Speech????
I loved Ophelia. Forty thousand brothers
could not, with all their quantities of love make up my sum.
Into the river and past the gums, Look out Lord,
Here she comes.
4:15 p.m.
Appointment with Osric
4:30 p.m.
Defy Augury
7:00 p.m.
Fencing match w/Leartes (send card re: Polonius)
I knew the practice would come in handy!!
7:30 p.m.
Kill Claudius (this time I mean it, he really has gone too far!)
7:32
Exchange forgiveness with Leartes
7:33 p.m.
FIND CURE FOR POISON!! FIND CURE FOR POISON!!
Cancel rest of appointments, the rest is silence.
