Open Letter to the Prejudiced Dickhole T-Shirt sales “man”.
Dear Dickhole:
All I was trying to do was buy a superhero T Shirt at a comic book convention. Let me recap our conversation for you:
You: (plausibly friendly) Does anyone need a hand with anything?
Me: Yes, actually, I could use a hand. I don’t suppose you have any shirts in a size small?
You: (turning slightly) No Man, we never do, we just never – not at the conventions.
Me: Oh. I see. But you have an online store, is that right?
You: (getting douchey) Yeah, but you’ll never bother me there.
Me: I beg your Pardon?
You: (douchier still) I said you’re never gonna bother me there Man.
Me: I see…
You: (getting your shovel) Yeah, cause in the last 5 years I have had, like, 2 orders for size small stuff.
Me: Look, it’s okay, I’ll move on…
You (digging a trench for the battle): Yeah, and you know what’s wrong with you small people?