An Open Letter to Musicians Who Write Songs About Corporate Life, Money, and Wealth.
Dear Musicians:
Please stop pretending to understand economics, real jobs, or what a cubicle is like.
Allow me to explain: I’m a musician too. I completely understand where you are coming from. Your socialist views, your bohemian Taoist life choices, your vegan diets. Being an artist full time requires a weird dedication to your craft that sets you apart from other musical hobbyists. Sometimes you have an idea at 3:00 in the morning, and you simply must wake up and record it. Sometimes you practice a new chord you “invented” until your fingers bleed, just because you don’t have callouses in those exact fingering positions. Sometimes you are forced to turn down a teenaged groupie because your only groupies are teenaged, and you realize they are only into you because you rent a bachelor apartment and own a leather jacket that you claim to wear ironically due to your veganism. Then you write a song for the teenaged groupie anyway, which you perform to her on your would-be-ironic second hand chesterfield which you retrieved in your buddy’s truck from Value Village, or possibly the Salvation Army Goodwill store. You work at night, and you can’t get up early because of it. Can’t even make it out to busk at lunch, can you?
Hypocrisy defined for Dawn Soap:
Oh, hey, Dawn Soap.
Um, so I think it’s great you can be used to scrub crude oil off of ducks, and stuff.
Um, but, um, do you need to be used to scrub simulated oil off of real marine animals in your ads?