An Open Letter to the Writers of the Green Lantern movie re: My Deep Confusion
Dear Writers of the Green Lantern Movie who I am too lazy to IMDB:
Some of our regular readers here at The Correctness know I am not an expert on all things Green Lantern. I made a whimsical comment at one point about Hal Jordan getting his powers from being bitten by a radioactive lantern, and a few nerds took offense and sent death threats. As a consequence of my ignorant and insensitive comment, I was shipped away by my fellow contributors at The Correctness to Green Lantern boot camp. I read “Secret Origins”, “Rebirth” and “Sinestro Corps War”. I even got started on “Blackest Night”, which I have had the courtesy not to confuse with the “Dark Knight” which is a different thing in your DC universe entirely. The Dark Knight was the guy who got bitten by the radioactive bat, whereas I am now aware that Hal Jordan’s powers are generated by an immense night-light on the planet Oprah. All sorted.
Having learned so much about the Green Lantern(s), I must say I was shocked when your film strayed so far from the origin story I was familiar with. I was agape (agape? a grape?) – I was a grape in the audience at my local multiplex when the story onscreen was so wildly different that I almost thought I was in the wrong theatre!