Travel Guide to Middle Earth
Good news everyone! We have excerpts from the 2009 guidebook to Middle Earth!
Staying in the Barrow Downs:
Accommodations:
Accommodations are available, but dusty at best. If your room has a barrow wight, you’ll want to put in a call to Tom Bombadil, his songs are the strongest.
Read More
Smackdown: AWESOME UNDERCARD! Daedalus vs. Gargamel vs. Gamera
We here at The Correctness have listened to our fans, and we know we couldn’t design a superhero or supervillain smackdown to please everyone. In fact, we couldn’t design an article to please everyone, and I particularly can’t please anyone with anything for any reason. Mind you, somebody decided to make the film “Extreme Ops”, so I don’t know how any human could be pleased with that either.
Read More…
Overly Honest Burger Advertising Quandry
Dear Local Restaurant/Lounge: I drove past your street sign the other day, its flourescent letters still arranged in their original message- a tantalizing offering to the urban teens with time to spare. How many words contain the necessary letters for “Ass Rods on Your Nuts”, I wonder? In any case, your sign, confoundingly, said the following: “We have one of the best burgers in town!” Where do I begin? If you had simply claimed to...
Hannigate: Or Why I am a Huge Jerk
You have no idea how much it pains me to admit this. Trust me, I don’t like it any more than you do. But last night I found I could deny this no more and I had to come right out and say it. Alyson Hannigan, adorable though she may be… (sigh) is not such a great actress. This hurts me deeply, One of the reasons I first asked out my wife was that she reminded me of Alyson Hannigan. I am not debating cuteness at this juncture. But I feel...
Fashion Affliction
I recently spent a weekend at the West Edmonton Mall, home of various lemurs, waterslides, and aging amusement park rides. While each of those things is worthy of much attention, the thing that was consistently evident was this: Men’s fashion is in a dire state of affairs. I’m talking worse than the 70’s. Worse than the 80’s. Makes the flannel of the 90’s seem like a 3 piece suit. The ratio of awfulness...