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Dear Fans of The Correctness:
Recently, we had one of our fans leave our site for good, because we (okay, I) accidentally offended her. I am very sorry. Since we are down now to only four fans total, I felt I would take a break from the funny and try to do something for the betterment of mankind that you can all appreciate.
What could be more free from controversy and possible offensive content than a delicious recipe? Almost nothing! So here, to provide something safe and comforting for you, is a nostalgic recipe.
Genocide Racist Nazi Crippled Abortion Trans Gendered Catholic Priest Rape Squares:
3 tablespoons butter or margarine
1 package (10 oz., about 40) regular marshmallows
- OR -
4 cups miniature marshmallows
6 cups Puffed Rice Cereal
1. In large saucepan melt butter over low heat. Add marshmallows and stir until completely melted. Remove from heat.
2. Add Puffed Rice Cereal cereal. Stir until well coated.
3. Using buttered spatula or wax paper evenly press mixture into 13 x 9 x 2-inch pan coated with cooking spray. Cool. Cut into 2-inch squares. Best if served the same day.
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that’s so strange… I use that exact same recipe for something my mom always called “rice crispy treats.” Had I known what they were really called I would have slapped her for making them…
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Can these squares also be retarded?
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Hold on, I need to stop laughing uncontrollably.
Five minutes later, okay, done.
A friend of mine sent me this link and said, “Congratulations, you being a b*tch finally hurt someone’s feelings.”
I’m sort of flattered that my opinion, which is usually treated like dirt on the sites I visit, actually mattered to you, Robbie. You made up for the original hurt by changing the picture in the original article, but this is bonus hilarity. Wow. Thanks for brightening my very very boring afternoon.
I hope you’ve learned to look at your articles objectively before sending them in, and maybe to even get someone (like an editor) to check them for you as well. If you google around about ‘editorial guidelines’, you should be able to compile a handy to-do list that will also include grammar/spelling checks and formatting.
I’m back on the fence about reading The Correctness now that you put so much time into making it up to me. I’ll keep an eye on the site and decide later.
If you’ll excuse me, I’ve got Rape Squares to make.
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RobbieRobTown Reply:
October 26th, 2009 at 3:38 pm
We’ll see what the “You see, Timmy” was here. We do this for love of it. Enjoy your Rape Squares.
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admin_rock Reply:
October 26th, 2009 at 3:58 pm
“I hope you’ve learned to look at your articles objectively before sending them in, and maybe to even get someone (like an editor) to check them for you as well.”
WTF?
Did you even read this article? Someone clearly missed the point.
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FekketCantenel Reply:
October 26th, 2009 at 4:26 pm
Admin_rock, feeling left out because I forgot to mention in my comment that I still feel alienated by your unnecessarily rude behavior?
The “point” was Robby’s much-appreciated actions, which were to 1) replace the offending image and 2) turn the whole thing into a fun joke.
The possible flipside is that this apology post was a satire of my complaints and that, despite his initial apologies, replacement of the offending image, and all other logical indications, Robbie is actually making fun of me. I don’t buy that, though. I think you, Admin_rock, just don’t like me. I don’t think I’ve deserved any of the snide comments you’ve aimed at me and would like to request that you leave behind your negativity.
Robbie, I take your comment to mean that you don’t care to do any in-depth editing of your posts. I understand that you want to keep this process casual, but don’t be surprised in the future if you accidentally post something objectionable and people let you know. And since it’s a pretty diverse world, it gets harder every day to avoid crossing the line, hence my suggestion of a stricter process. But, of course, it’s up to you. Edited or not, I hope you have as much fun with your writing as I’m having with my Rape Squares.
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xorro Reply:
November 6th, 2009 at 3:17 pm
You may want wash the sand out of your vagina.
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He’s a site admin, and she’s got a desk job somewhere! Together, they fight crime!
[at the edge of a cliff]
Fekket: Don’t let go of me!
Admin: Hold on!
Fekket: Oh Noes! Zombies!
Admin: The talking makes you heavy!
Fekket: How?
Join us on the comments section of every few articles for:
COP OPPOSITE PEOPLE MELODRAMA SHOW THING SHOW!
On Fox, this fall.
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FekketCantenel Reply:
October 26th, 2009 at 6:47 pm
Bra. Freaking. Vo. Wow. I literally applauded that comment for a good thirty seconds.
I officially take back what I said about The Correctness not being funny. If Robbie is one of three contributors, this site is 33.3% funny.
Is my weight being relative to my verbosity a superpower or just a mental kryptonite for Dave? Also, is Dave the one who pushed me over the cliff? Is that his power?
Or should we just wait for episode 3 to find out?
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Tbinns Reply:
October 29th, 2009 at 5:00 pm
I’ve thought about it for a little while now but I have definately come to the conclusion that I am also funny. Good thing I took a moment to think about it…you had me worried for a second there.
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FekketCantenel Reply:
October 31st, 2009 at 12:10 pm
Hey, there. I haven’t seen much of your (Tony’s) material lately, other than your contributions to the superhero contest. Therefore, I consider your 33% of the site to be ‘quantum funny’ at the moment. I hope to see some articles by you in the future so I can figure out if you actually are.
Sorry if my praise of Robbie made you feel left-out. I like that you’re confident in your own humor, though.
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Um Im offended…
Marshmellows have geliten in them.
Geliten has animal bone marrow in it.
I’m a vegatarian.
I’m gone FOREVER!!
or this later
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admin_rock Reply:
October 27th, 2009 at 10:16 am
But they’re NOT Mormon, so it’s okay.
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Oh, RobbieRobTown – when will you ever learn NOT to flirt with the psychopaths?
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people are strange
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FekketCantenel Reply:
October 28th, 2009 at 8:52 am
when you’re a stranger
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I guess she doesn’t have any Jewish Friends. That’s a shame. I would have enjoyed another receipe.
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FekketCantenel Reply:
October 28th, 2009 at 12:25 pm
… huh. Have you ever sat up and realized, “I have no Jewish friends!”? I just did that. Now I feel kind of bad. I’d post a recipe about it, but I can’t think of a title as good as Robbie’s.
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Is it acceptable to add peanutbutter to Rape Squares…
(for some reason now I envision a little dog doing a lot of licking)
Wait… Nevermind…
I’ll just substitute the butter with K Y Jelly…
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