Superteam Smackdown is coming soon
Well, after a delightful lunch on a patio, The Correctness collectively decided we liked the sound of a Team Smackdown. We tossed some names out, but have yet to make any official brackets, so now is your chance to speak up.
Some things you should know…Heroes can only belong to one team in the tournament, ie: Wolverine can fight for the X-Men or The Avengers, not both. Also the teams will consist of the SPECIFIC heroes we lay out. So when we say “The Avengers” We would say “Consisting of Thor, Iron Man, Captain America, Wasp, and Giant Man.” and we decide that Hulk is Fighting for the Defenders, or that we decide Hawkeye is lame and doesn’t make the cut, so be it. Let’s face it, if we let EVERYONE who has ever been an X-Man fight it would be chaos.
Here are some of the names we are kicking around so far, feel free to make your suggestions below.
The Avengers
The X-Men
The Fantastic Four
The Justice League
The Teen Titans
The Watchmen
The Defenders
Alpha Flight (Canadian, eh?)
The League of Extraordinary Gentleman
The Inhumans
The BRPD
The JSA
And don’t worry…Rob has plenty of epic side battles planned (Muppet Babies vs The Scooby Doo gang, anyone?)
So…who did we miss? Speak now or forever hold your insults.
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Recently, as our regulars know, we went to universities all over North America and asked for essays to be entered into a new contest just for surly teen freshmen. Almost no entries were posted, save only this highly offensive submission from "Billy, Age 18". We weren't going to share it, but then...
Please be warned, this inexplicable rant contains NSFW language.
Before we begin, I would once again like to stress and clarify that these are my FAVOURITE performances. The “Best” performances would be a different kind of debate, and would, if the AFI is to be believed, need to involve a lengthy discussion of “Some Like it Hot” a movie that I appear to be completely alone in not giving a shit about.
Dear readers: This rant is a break from the haha, and a chance for an interesting discussion. If you are in the mood for some funnies, why not check out this jem from our back catalogue: http://www.thecorrectness.com/writing/travel-guide-to-middle-earth/ And now, a serious rant: The Collapse of Social Science: If there was one in the first place... Some of you folks know I am back to school, and I have been reintroduced to my old arch-nemesis, social science. Oh, just to clarify, not any one specific social science is my arch nemesis. It's actually ALL of the social sciences. Group elements of psychology, sociology, social anthropology, communications theory, and to some extent economics. I won't even attempt to classify philosophy in here.
To Whom it May Concern:
Listen, we know you're looking at us. We get it. We're on the big side, as far as breasts go. Along with Katy's eyes, we represent most of the oversized stuff on her. And certainly, we've helped her get to where she is today. Our presence requires her to build up her lung capacity, and makes it easy for her to get meetings with agents and record producers.
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Slight correction: we would NEVER say that Wolverine could fight for the Avengers, because it’s just plain retarded that he’s even part of that group.
admin_rock(Quote) (Reply)
Correctness, I am disappoint. You’ve overlooked so many quality teams…
The Powerpuff Girls (w/ Dexter for a 4th)
The Voltron Force
The Ginyu Force
The Thundercats
The Care Bears
The Gummi Bears
The Smurfs
Jem & The Holograms
Ed, Edd, & Eddy
The list goes on and on!
n8(Quote) (Reply)
Don’t you worry, Rob just gleefully jotted those down for the undercard, I’m sure.
Tbinns(Quote) (Reply)
Questions…
1. Are you leaving out Evil Teams? Such as the Sinister Six & The Brotherhood ect?
2. Are Transformers out. Not general Autobots / Decpticons. More specifically groups like The Dinobots, Constructicons or Insecticons ect. They are a Marvel comic series.
3. Do the wonder twins count as a team?
4. Are the (Eastman and Laird) Ninja Turtles out? They’d do about as well as the Watchmen (sans Manhattan)
Tomass(Quote) (Reply)
I believe we are leaving out Evil teams, keeping this one heroes only I think.
No Transformer groups. The Michael bay scars run deep
The Wonder twins don’t even count as characters much less a team. Form of …something that doesn’t suck, please
I don’t believe the Turtles are on the table (Ahhh but the Watchmen DO have Dr. Manhattan…They DO)
Tbinns(Quote) (Reply)
I mention the Wonder twins only because they suck so much. I thought they would be a good bum fight / undercard to toss in. Seriously what wouldn’t be funny about the wonder twins being slaughtered?
And…
Fuck “The Bayformers” and the shy cow they rode in on! Those fucking movies just keep on raping my childhood. Seriously they have me circa 1984 locked in a damp stinky garage somewhere in deepest darkest Hollywood. They are routing the living shit out of every orifice in my young body and living off my tormented screams and innocent tears! Micheal Bay is there and he’s directing those two racist Chevy Sub-compacts to hold me down while the all new Chevrolet Camero pee’s on me and the twisted abortion that he calls Wheelie humps my face!
I beg you Tbinns free yourself from the greasy blond Bay hair, Baysplosions and the porn-star quality acting of Megan Fox. This is not a plea for inclusion of Transformers into the smackdown. No, no! This is a plea for you to liberate a young boy, nay countless former children who are being inconceivably violated by wrecking ball testicles, metal tentacles and plot holes the size of Micheal Bays ego. Make the metal separation, The Transformers are NOT the Bayformers.
Fuck you Bay! Humans are only ancillary characters!
There I’m better now.
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/e/ec/Spider-ManvsMegatron.jpg
As a redundant side note, did you know that if you type “Bayformers” into Wikipedia it brings up the “Bay-Movie” page.
Tomass(Quote) (Reply)
How about the Super Buddies from, formerly known as the justice league, and I can’t believe it’s not the Justice league?
Sky(Quote) (Reply)
First why always bash marvel about team switching… Name one DC hero that has not been apart of the JL at one time?
Second the JSA and Teen Titans are just basiclly watered down versions of JL. So would recommend Legion of Super-Heroes, Metal Men, and Birds of Prey.
Third to even out and make the writing easier make all teams the best known 5 heroes. With FF just add Spiderman he subs in and teams up with them all the time (or Franklin Richards if you want FF to go deep).
Like the use of LoEG that was thinking outside the box.
Two to add to N8′s list are Captain Planet and the Planeteers and the Power Rangers
Uncle Soondead(Quote) (Reply)
“First why always bash marvel about team switching… Name one DC hero that has not been apart of the JL at one time?”
Mostly, that’d be me, because I think it’s stupid to have Wolverine in the Avengers AND the X-Men AND X-Force AND every other title, at the same time.
If he walked out of the X-men, and then appeared in the Avengers, i’d accept athat. It would be a little stupid, but more believable.
dave(Quote) (Reply)
You could do an east coast west coast with the Avengers and with the JLA as an easy way to break up who is on what team and to add two more teams.
Crash(Quote) (Reply)
What about adding the Authority to the list?
spcMike(Quote) (Reply)
I’m not sure if the Watchmen are such a good idea. I can’t really imagine anybody being able to put up a fight against Dr. Manhattan.
Good idea though. I’m looking forward to this.
robostapler(Quote) (Reply)
Not even Dr. Strange? Who is a member of the Defenders?
Tbinns(Quote) (Reply)
That’s a good point. I suppose magic is the only thing that could possibly hurt Dr. Manhattan. That, and Batman.
robostapler(Quote) (Reply)
What? No Green Lantern Corps?
Treker(Quote) (Reply)
I’d like an east-meets-west team smackdown (e.g. Sailor Scouts vs Power Rangers), but that sounds a bit difficult.
SkyeWalker7(Quote) (Reply)
Will you not have the same problem as the superhero smackdown. ie. The JLA has Superman and he has an embarassing number of powers enabling them to anihalate everything in their path.
Dickdastardly4(Quote) (Reply)