Superteam Smackdown: Brackets and Rules!
It’s time people.
Here are the brackets for the Superteam Smackdown:
Week 1: The Defenders (Doctor Strange, Namor, Silver Surfer, and The Hulk) versus The Watchmen (Dr. Manhattan, Rorschach, Nite Owl, Comedian, Ozymandius)
Week2 : The JLA (Superman, Wonder Woman, Flash, Batman, Aquaman) Vs. The Fantastic Four (Reed Richards, Sue Richards, Johnny Storm and the Thing)
You: Woah Woah, Woah AQUAMAN? They CHOSE AQUAMAN?
Us: Yep.
TOMASS: Sweeet!!!
YOU: Where the hell is Green Lantern?
US: He’s on the Green Lantern Corps team
YOU: Okay, so where is the Green Lantern Corp?
US: On a press junket for the upcoming Ryan Reynolds movie. (We are a little gun shy of the Lanterns after last time).
YOU: Oh you guys suck!!
US: That reminds me, This time we are offering a prize for the best insult in the talkback section. Unleash your nerd rage creatively and we will send you a limited edition Correctness T-Shirt. Shall we continue?
WEEK 3 : The Avengers (Thor, Iron Man, Captain America, Hawkeye, Giant Man) versus Alpha Flight (Guardian, Puck, Sasquatch, Shaman, Snowbird)
WEEK 4: X-men (Cyclops, Wolvie, Jean, Colossus, and Rogue) Versus The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (Mina, Quartermain, Mr. Hyde, The Invisible Man and Captain Nemo)
YOU: Alpha Flight is in, and the Lanterns are OUT?
US: Canadian Content Laws. FCC. Our hands are tied. Now, if you please…if you keep interrupting, we’ll never get through this.
YOU: What about side cards?
US: Sigh… We couldn’t stop RobbieRobTown if we tried.
RULES:
-The two day prep, fight in an arena still applies.
-No outside interference from people who are NOT on your team. Ie: No stunts from Franklin and Professor X. Your team is your team and that’s who you’ve got.
-Heroes with Multiple team affiliations can only fight for 1 team
- Only 5 members max per team. Current lineups are based on our choices, as we are awesome.
-Remember, this speculation is based on the TEAM MEMBERS we have assembled. Yes, the results would have been very different if Professor X was on the Team, or Green Lantern, or Martian Manhunter or whomever. But they aren’t, so the results are based on who we’ve got. However, having said that…
-You have 1 week before the first round starts, so argue passionately and intelligently about why so and so should be on a particular team and we MAY do a few substitutions. However, once the tournament starts, it’s locked in.
So there it is. Let’s keep it clean (ish) and have fun out there!
30 Responses to “Superteam Smackdown: Brackets and Rules!”
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Dr. Manhattan? How is anybody supposed to fight against that? He won the war in vietnam singlehandedly in 3 months. He is a god like being able to see the future, and is the master of manipulating molecules of anything, if he is in this there can only be one winner. Although to be fair he is the only member with superpowers.
Beardy(Quote) (Reply)
I meant the only member on the watchmen.
Beardy(Quote) (Reply)
I actually asked this same question a while ago. Keep in mind that the rest of the members of the Watchmen have no superpowers and Dr. Strange can use magic against Dr. Manhattan which is something that doesn’t seem to exist in the Watchmen universe.
robostapler(Quote) (Reply)
Many of these teams have members who can send Dr. Manhattan into a different dimension. I don’t know if he can overcome that, as the physics of the phantom zone or negative zone are completely different. Also, he’d probably be so interested in these new phenomena that he’d forget about the fight.
Chadster(Quote) (Reply)
Apathy is the only reason Jon’s not a factor.
He wouldn’t care about any of this, and that leaves his team woefully underpowered.
ZeroCorpse(Quote) (Reply)
anything Ozymandius can do the bat can do better. The good dr doesn’t stand a chance. Between the gooddamn batman and the over powered superman. JLA all the way baby!
Elmock(Quote) (Reply)
Yeah, hard to see how the JLA loses, unless Rogue can lay hands on Supes really quickly.
n8(Quote) (Reply)
In fact, I suspect Bats will see that coming a mile away and have a kryptonite counter with her name on it, ready & waiting.
n8(Quote) (Reply)
this list = meh.
Where are the Champions? (HERO Games version?)
JustBeib(Quote) (Reply)
I’m pretty excited to see this, gentlemen. The only quibble I have is that Aquaman is on the Justice League when everyone knows that he sucks and Batman would have given him bad directions to go to that one donut shop WAY THE FUCK across town so they didn’t have to personally tell him in person that Martian Manhunter would be taking his place.
robostapler(Quote) (Reply)
I am all for aquaman, his beard is glorious! Plus he has a harpoon hand. A HARPOON HAND! I bet he has even met Spongebob, although it would be hard to fit into that pineapple to visit for tea.
Mebert(Quote) (Reply)
Superman AND Batman on one team? You might as well call off the contest. JLA all the way!
j0sh(Quote) (Reply)
Send me a shirt and THEN i willl comment. Until you comply with my demands … well i aint gonna say a damn thing
1/4 20(Quote) (Reply)
we both know that’s not true
Tbinns(Quote) (Reply)
YES IT IS! *stamping foot petulantly*
1/4 20(Quote) (Reply)
Ya me too! I’m not posting any more until I get free shit! Appease me or feel my silence!
Tomass(Quote) (Reply)
I like, some good picks. Every team has a Mega-powered member. The comedic possibilities of this event are limitless on all fronts.
Oooh Doctor Strange… Superman may just get bent over a barrel yet!
Tomass(Quote) (Reply)
Undercard!
Green Lantern Corp Vs. The Smurfs (Gnap infected) Vs. The 1984-85 line-up of the Winnipeg Jets
Tomass(Quote) (Reply)
How long are these written fights going to be? The Hulk versus Batman Quarterfinal is a little over 1200 words or 3 formatted pages. Not that I am complaining, but there are now five people on each team. Are we looking at 6000 (500% increase) words or more like 4500 (275% increase).
Are you expanding the fight coverage as there are only four weeks? For example, there were 16 heroes in the Superhero smackdown, 15 fights, and using 1200 words as an average; we get 18000 words total. If each heroes were covered equally (which they are not, as once beaten, they are forgotten like everything in life), they would get 1125 words.
In the current smackdown, there are 8 teams of 40 heroes with 7 fights until crowned. Should we expect 18000 words again (i.e 45 pages) or should we expect one of the of the following:
1. Each hero get would average to 1125 words of coverage equaling 45000 words or roughly 118 formatted pages.
2. there are 7 fights, each team has 5 people, multiply that by the 1200 average and then by the number of fights and we get 42000 words or roughly the same as option #1 above.
3. Fuck it. It’ll depend how drunk admin_Rock is.
Maberso(Quote) (Reply)
Somebody likes stat porn!
Though I trust your numbers are good, you’re overlooking one very important factor: We’re pretty f*cking lazy.
admin_rock(Quote) (Reply)
Once I finished posting…I changed out of my freshly geek covered pants and smoked a cigarette.
I tried to account for laziness by using previous articles as a proxy, but whatever.
I’m that guy that draws maps for mining in WOW based on my past mining stats. I pretty much ruin any game for myself by resorting to math.
My alarm clock song is below:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fhd8bcl7cdo
Maberso(Quote) (Reply)
Colossus over Iceman!? Totally not cool.
Lucas(Quote) (Reply)
Or Storm even. That one confounds me.
robostapler(Quote) (Reply)
Good point, it’s tough to narrow the X-men down to 5. You want to make sure you’ve covered the spectrum of powers, and brought a cohesive team forward. But this does deserve more consideration.
admin_rock(Quote) (Reply)
I think a good X-Men team would be:
Cyclops for the leadership/range
Wolvie for the melee/healing factor
Jean for the Phoenix Force/mental
Storm for the elements/leadership
Juggernaut for the muscle/durability
Iron Patriot(Quote) (Reply)
Hey, now. This is hardly fair!
The Fantastic Four (4 people) have to face off against a team consisting of five of the heaviest hitters in the DCU? Come on! Give the FF She-Hulk to make it an even match-up, at least.
Hell… Reed Richards was super-close with Bob (The Sentry). Let them have Sentry to counter Superman.
Otherwise, the FF might as well not show up.
ZeroCorpse(Quote) (Reply)
Fuck the Sentry. Seriously, if we were considering a fifth, there’s many more logical choices. I’m surprised at you.
admin_rock(Quote) (Reply)
Out of curiosity, are you using the current Aquaman? I know he’s classically the weakest superhero on the JLA, but right now, he’s still got some Black Lantern mumbo-jumbo going on, and all he can summon are the reanimated remains of sea creatures, none of which seem to care if about things like “pressure” and “water”, only problem being Aquaman can’t control them, just summon them. Also, all aquatic life in an unspecified area around him just dies, kinda has a nice synergy with his new summoning abilities.
Staticz(Quote) (Reply)
you left out the Authority and Superf*ckers, fuck this shit
brian(Quote) (Reply)
Given the teams, Defenders vs. JLA is the most likely outcome.
Assuming the fight HAS to stay in the arena, but the arena itself *can* be moved, Strange could shift everything to the Marvel universe except Batman. That would leave the JLA two members down, because the Flash has no powers without the Speed Force, and Batman would be in another universe. In JLA/Avengers, the Justice League needed Zatanna’s magic to cross universes, but she’s not on the roster, so Batman has no way back.
Strange could take Superman with his eyes closed.
Surfer would destroy Wonder Woman.
Namor would take Aquaman in a real fight, seeing as there’s no orca in the arena.
That leaves Hulk against the powerless Flash. Oof.
Winners: The Defenders.
Oh, and the Flash has never been that powerful in actual crossovers. He was easily the fastest character in JLA/Avengers, but he wasn’t throwing Infinite mass punches, stealing/lending speed, or any of those nifty tricks listed on Wikipedia.
Iron Patriot(Quote) (Reply)