Well, now I can cross “See a Beatle live” off of the old life list. My Hetero Life mate Trevor and I attended the Ringo Starr and his all Starr Band concert. Ringo said early on he just wanted people to have a little fun…and we sure did. Sometimes at his expense, but never mind that. His all star band included Edgar Winter, who was AWESOME by the way, particularly on “Frankenstein” . Rick Derringer, who I did not know was a member of the McCoys and they NAILED the vocals on “Hang on Sloopy”. (Who among us did not spend our whole childhoods thinking it was called “Hang on Snoopy?”) Gary Wright who believed he could get us through the night, a dude from the Romantics who told us what he liked about us, and someone from Mr. Mr. who took some broken wings and made them fly again.
All in all a super fun night. Made more fun by our constant commenting to each other. Here is a short sample for you to enjoy.

“Auuuughhhhhh!!!! A Beatle doing BEATLE SHIT!!!”
-Trevor , taking a moment to appreciate the significance of what we were doing that night, in the middle of “I wanna be your man”

“He looks like a photo negative of a Ramone”
-Trevor, upon seeing Edgar Winter live for the first time

“Okay…strap in for the suck”
-Tony, after Gary Wright was introduced and played the first few notes of “Dream Weaver”

“Uhhh is he wearing a SWEATER?”
-Trevor commenting on Gary Wrights’s Rock and Roll outfit

He looks like Mr. Rogers out there …’Can you sing Dream Weaver…sure, I knew you could’ “
-Tony, in response

“I miss Dream Weaver.”
-Tony, midway through a song off of Ringo’s new album called “The Other Side of Liverpool”

“I don’t think Eddie Van Halen is shitting himself right now”
-Tony, during Rick Derringers Guitar solo

“I think ALEX Van Halen just went “Meh”
-Trevor in response

“Yeah, THAT’s one of mine.”
-Ringo, to some guy in the crowd who shouted out “Let It Be”

“Ringo is doing some weird shoulder thing…look”
-Trevor, during “Broken Wings”

“Man, if Ringo STARR gets bored playing your song, it probably sucks”
-Tony in Response

“Hey THAT’S not one of your songs either!”
-Tony , when they closed with “Give Peace a Chance”

Peace and Love, everyone, from Trev, Tony and Ringo

June 9, 1987:
It was a hot night in the Big Easy, and the audience was rigid with anticipation- For good reason. Tonight, for the first time ever, Cockshark had shared the stage with Brothersucker. For one night only, two of the biggest, hardest acts in Metal would come together, simultaneously, in front of a crowd of thousands.

Brothersucker hit the stage first, surprising the audience with their size. Yes, their members had swollen as Brothersucker now had founding member and keyboardist Rock Dalton playing with them again. Minutes before the show, Brothersucker had taken him in the back to celebrate Rock’s hard homecoming. Coyly, the band had replaced their once traditional champagne showers with aerosol whipped cream, as a subtle tribute to Rock Dalton’s battle with alcohol. Dalton was obviously in on the joke, and he laughed joyously as the rest of Brothersucker covered him in their jets of cream.

Brothersucker head-man, Gino Difaggino, absolutely prowled the stage, licking up the energy from the crowd, as the band pounded into their hit single “Drinking from the Hose”. Difaggino had come a long way to be the head guy, painstakingly working his way up from the bottom.

DiFaggino worked as a masseuse, and also as a pool cleaner before striking it big with Brothersucker. “I was in the right place at the right time”, he says, ” The guys found me singing in a tiny bar off the main strip. They teased me, calling me “Goldenthroat”, that kind of thing. We just really hit it off, like one big happy, mixed up family.”

The crowd was elated to hear DiFaggino straddle his mic stand and jerk out the opening lines of “Cream Treat”. The Dalton penned song was a fan favourite, but hadn’t been performed in years. “When the fans are expecting you to perform, you have to perform. You can’t go halfway.” said DiFaggino.

But it was Cockshark’s big opening, dripping with sensuality, that really wowed the crowd. Their big opening was so impressive, the boys from Brothersucker said they’d like to watch- and watch they did, from the the side of the stage, as Cockshark seduced the audience and took them inside their opening.

David Gyzz of Cockshark recalled his opening after the show. “It was really huge. We never open that big, but the audience was with us all the way, gave us every inch of their attention, and it all just fit.”

After such a strong start, Cockshark could hardly top “He Wore Leather”, but they were hard at it with their next song “Ballroom Love”. “That’s the thing about “ballroom”. You’ve got to have it in there, or the show seems uncomfortable. Our fans love ballroom.”

Cockshark drummer Leslie Phillio was a vision in gold as he tore apart the solo in “Thigh High”, delicately taunting the snare, teasing the rim relentlessly, before finally plunging in for the big finish.

In the final encore, Cocksharks and Brothersuckers eagerly mounted the stage together, all at once. Ten sweaty men, all near exhaustion, but being cheered on by the crowd, traded songs back and forth, back and forth, working the crowd for every last drop of their sticky love, gobbling it down. Phillio pounded away harder and harder, and you could tell Rock Dalton was in deep- the look of tense concentration on his face was unmistakable.

(Note: This is a repost of the original).

I love me some Peter Gabriel. I really do. So imagine my delight when I found out there was a free stream of his latest recording “Scratch My Back” available online. He covers some of his favourite artists, like David Bowie, Radiohead, Paul Simon, Arcade Fire and Neil Young. In turn, all those artists will do an album of Peter Gabriel covers called “I’ll Scratch Yours.”

That’s a pretty cool idea, I think. Gabriel doing Bowie, Bowie doing Gabriel? Sign me up.

But here’s the thing. Every song is slowed down to funereal pace, with synth and strings and mournful keening. Which in a weird way, kind of works for his cover of Heroes, but for the WHOLE ALBUM? Good God. It’s only to be listened to when in the manic phase of ones mental illness. Even Peter himself is bored of it…look at that picture, he is so comatose he has to manually push his eyebrow up to register some kind of facial expression.

It would be like “So” with every track at the same pace as “Red Rain” without “Sledgehammer” and “Big Time” to brighten the mood a little. Which would then make the album title “So What?” more apropos.

But don’t take my word for it, click right here and take a listen for yourself. Who knows, you might find it haunting and achingly beautiful. Or you might start the long arduous task of rubbing your wrists on the blunt edge of your desk in an effort to slice them open in 5-6 hours.

That said if he tours again I will totally go see him. That’s how awesome he is.

(Note: This is a repost of the original).

The Correctness has been lax in it’s duty to our readers lately. We’ve been ignoring your need for some serious literary discussion and parsing of ludicrous pop songs. In order to alleviate this, we present an in-depth look at a song by a woman with a dollar sign in her name.

Wake up in the morning feeling like P Diddy

A bold beginning, bringing the listener straight into the action, with little or no preparation. Our subject is awake, and having an emotional reaction. However, we’re uncertain what that reaction is, as, in order to understand the simile, we’re forced to have a general understanding of how P Diddy feels, or alternately, what aspect of P Diddy the subject is meant to be emulating. Curious, a riddle presented in the opening. Perhaps this will evolve through the narrative to be important.

Grab my glasses, I’m out the door, I’m gonna hit this city

The subject continues to prepare for the day, now leaving her (we’ll assume this is a female, based on the singer). She is preparing to take on her world, to get involved, be active. She is, however, bringing her glasses, perhaps to hide some aspect of herself from the world. Curious. What is she trying to hide, one wonders.

Before I leave, brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack

But wait, she hasn’t left yet, or perhaps she’s returned inside. She needs alcohol, a fix of some kind before she can continue. Again, this seems to point to some challenge or uncertainty she has to struggle with. Why does she need to alter her state in order to continue her day?

‘Cause when I leave for the night, I ain’t coming back

Confusion. We know that it is morning, and yet she uses the phrase “leave for the night”. Certainly “leave for the day” would make more sense, and position the reader for the likely fact that she will not be returning again for some time. There is a possibility that the “home” doesn’t even belong to our subject, that she is perhaps leaving from the previous night. This could be the end of a one night stand?

I’m talking pedicure on our toes, toes

Our subject is now with others, referencing “our toes”. She has joined with what we can assume are friends, taking time to make her feet presentable.

Trying on all our clothes, clothes

The preparation for (what we can assume is) an evening out continues, with the subject attempting to present an aspect of herself to the world. We’re seeing a theme of changing, hiding, making presentable.

Boys blowing up our phones, phones

We can assume that “blowing up our phones” means that the boys are calling constantly, as opposed to their being involved in actively exploding those phones. This creates the idea that the subject and friends are popular, and in demand from men.

Drop-topping, playing our favorite CDs

The subject’s group is moving toward their destination, enjoying music. Perhaps they are listening to P Diddy?

Pulling up to the parties
Trying to get a little bit tipsy

We’ll deal with these lines together. The group arrives a number of parties, with the goal of consuming more alcohol. We start to see a thread of impermanence, of moving from one event to the next, of searching for something. Combined with the recurrence of drinking, this leads us to assume there is something the subject is avoiding, or escaping from, though it is still not certain what that is.

CHORUS:
Don’t stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, I’mma fight
‘Til we see the sunlight
Tick tock on the clock
But the party don’t stop, no

The Chorus is quite simply a plea from the subject to Time itself. The struggle, the weight of the subject’s pysche is so great that she simply needs to avoid it at all costs. She wishes for the night to continue forever. She wants to “fight”, to prevent responsibility, and to not have to face herself. But time will not be stopped, and the clock continues to “tick tock”, and draw her inevitably towards her showdown with her inner self.

Ain’t got a care in world, but got plenty of beer

We can only assume that the subject is being ironic about not having a care in the world, since she clearly is escaping from her troubles, and immediately consuming beer to further avoid them.

Ain’t got no money in my pocket, but I’m already here

Perhaps this is a clue to our subject’s strife? She has no money, perhaps a struggle with finance or lack of work? Has her morning drinking cost her her job? No matter, she is “already here”, whatever the case is, her fate is set, she is resigned to it.

And now, the dudes are lining up cause they hear we got swagger
But we kick em to the curb unless they look like Mick Jagger

The word is out that subject and her group are at the club, and they are all interested, as there is word that this group is a potent one, full of interest and power. However, they will soon find that they are unwanted, unless they have a specific look:

This is troubling, the impression we’ve been given is that this group is interested in the “party life”, and youth, beauty, eternal evenings. But the idea that they are only interested in this specific look creates a bit of a paradox.

I’m talking about everybody getting crunk, crunk

The subject is describing the way in which the club is “getting crunk”, meaning they are reacting to a style of music, or possibly this could mean that they are, in fact, getting cranky? Which in light of the company they prefer, would make sense, as the men they are interested in are quite old.

Boys tryin’ to touch my junk, junk

Now this is where things really get tricky. The Urban Dictionary defines “junk” as “Male genitalia”. Up until this point, we’ve assumed that the narrator was a woman, though a review will show that the only reason we might have to think this is that because the song is sung by a woman. This forces us to review all that we think we know. Is it possible that we’ve been misled?

Is the subject is in possession of male genitalia? That “she” is, in fact, a “he”? Are we dealing with a homosexual subject? Perhaps some kind of transgendered person or hermaphrodite?

This seems a strong likelyhood, and is supported by a number of the lines above. The subject is clearly running from and avoiding something. One suspects it is “her” own sexual identity. Perhaps “he” is a self-loathing homosexual, who is unable to come to terms with himself and thus hides through drinking and pedicures following nights spent with strangers.

Gonna smack him if he getting too drunk, drunk

We’re unclear as to whom the “him” refers, likely one of the other men in the club, but the subject reveals a concern about the other person becoming too drunk. This would likely cause the individual to be unable to perform sexually, or perhaps just exhibit unwanted, perhaps un-Diddylike behavior

Now, now, we go until they kick us out, out
Or the police shut us down, down

An indication that the subject needs for this distraction to continue forever, that ending the party will be unbearable. A possible alternate reading would be that the subject is referring to the Gay rights struggle, that the “fight” will go on until the police are forced to act.

Police shut us down, down
Po-po shut us

This concept is repeated, strengthening the resolve for the fight, and the likelihood that there can be no end except this. The line devolves into an almost T.S. Eliot-like drone.

DJ, you build me up
You break me down
My heart, it pounds
Yeah, you got me

The subject is reaching the crux of “her” fight with her psyche. She now realizes that she cannot hide, that she can no longer run from what she is, whom she has become. The DJ, the situation has brought her to realize that her fleeing has become her strength, the rock which she can anchor her soul to. But it also becomes the crucible in which she is taken apart, all of her faults on display. The fight is over, she can no longer hide her true self. She finally gives in, and accepts what she is.

With my hands up
You got me now
You got that sound
Yeah, you got me

The acceptance is growing, she has conceded to her struggle, given in completely. The voice of reason within her has spoken, and she complies.

DJ, you build me up
You break me down
My heart, it pounds
Yeah, you got me

With my hands up
Put your hands up
Put your hands up

The subject transitions into full acceptance, though fearful, she is now ready to not only accept who she/he is, but also encourages the listener to do the same, to give in to their/our own inner struggle, and to “put your hands up”.

As our journey through the struggles of the subject continues, it becomes more and more clear that “Tik Tok” is a song of change. It takes us on a journey from scared, hidden self-loathing, hatred for the true self, to a full acceptance of an alternative lifestyle. It is a glorious appeal for everyone to stop hating their inner selves, and to face that reality head on, and allow it to flourish.

The brilliance within is that such a clear message of such a delicate nature is hidden within a fairly crappy pop song. That juxtaposition is the crowning glory of this song. That what seems to be utterly devoid of importance or worth hides within it a beautiful moment self-revelation.